Monkeys, Gastroenteritis, and why one should not eat foreign plants

It all started two days ago. We were trying to decide if we wanted to go to the jungle to go tubing down the rapids in a rainforest or spend more time exploring the islands of Southern Thailand. I had made mention of Ling (monkeys) and everyone got excited. We ended up talking to one of the waiters at our resort and he had a friend whom would take us to the monkeys for around$60.00. We ended up taking a 15 minute drive and getting on a long tailed speed boat ( I will show you a picture later.) We went through the mangrove forests to another bank on the way out to see. Staring directly across from us was a terrestial monkey. Our boat drivers starting throwing chunks of pineapple ashore and monkeys started appearing from everywhere. Old monkeys. big balled monkeys, nursing monkeys, baby monkies. Many many monkeys. THe highlight was watching two monkeys boom-boom (I think you know what that means.) Ergi recorded the whole thing on his camera in a movie. We then went home to rest before taking a sea kayaking island tour the next morning. Ergi and Chris were exhausted. (Chris had a dirtbike accident before I met them and fucked himself up pretty bad... we call him gimpu). Bill and I went to dinner and stupidly ordered fruit lassies. We would end up regretting this later. In the middle of dinner a lightning storm began with a tropical shower that shut off the power leaving Bill and I running home using only lightning flashes as light along the beach front.The next day we all awoke, and lo and behold went to the same dock to get on the same Long Tailed Boat to see the same Monkeys. But first, we went sea kayaking and caving. The caving was ridiculous it was basicallty pitch black and one needed ropes to climb due to the steep elevation. By about midday, when lunch happened, Bill was really ill and started vomiting, gave the fishes a free lunch, and we ended up not spending much time on the Monkeys the second time around. While Bill lay, moaning in pain, Ergi decided to rip a large fern leaf with his teeth... About two minutes later he was screaming... it burns it burns, I can't feel my ams, I can't feel my arms. The plant he had tasted was an alkaloid like bathroom cleaner. We started washing his mouth out with salt water for the next ten minutes while everyone watched and laughed in amusement. By the time, we got back to our hotel, I was now bloated and nauseous. The next ten hours were my giving offerings to porcelain god while cursing the contaminated yogurt of the fruit lassie. This morning I feel better, but am still not one hundred percent. We leave to go the rock climbing settlement of Railey Beach.